tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11606874.post7382445690425728056..comments2023-11-03T10:43:31.023-05:00Comments on The Reluctant Jam Boy: 5 Hours and 45 Minutes of InsanityTom Collinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11022106971991560269noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11606874.post-21752182521576115402007-04-25T08:41:00.000-05:002007-04-25T08:41:00.000-05:00EveningI wish I could play on Mondays. Most days,...Evening<BR/><BR/>I wish I could play on Mondays. Most days, for that matter. I'm thinking, with the membership for your course being as it is, most members can probably play whenever the hell they like, but most of them still work to keep themselves in the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed. And Mondays are When. Things. Get. Done. I bet the longer the week goes on, the busier it gets. It sounds lovely, though. I would jack work in and play all the time, once I'd made my first few million and live off the interest.<BR/><BR/>Wasn't it in that bloody awful chick flick thing that was a crappy modern remake of "The Taming of the Shrew" (that's Shakesperare, what?) (talking of Shakespeare, that bit in "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka" where they have the Pimp of the Year Awards and the Huggy Bear dude is reciting his poetry "My whore better have my money/Not half, not some, but all my cash/'Cause if she don't,/I'm gonna put my foot in her ass" and some guy in the audience goes "That's motherfucking Shakespeare" ... makes me laugh) Where was I? Oh yeah, whatever that film was called and they drew a giant dong on some guy's face. That's what I was picturing. "I believe your 7 iron would be the club for you here, sir" "Piss off, cocksucker"<BR/><BR/>I can't pinch one off when I'm in mid-flow. Once I've started, I've got to get all of the bugger out or it's worse than if I hadn't gone at all.<BR/><BR/>I can hit my PW 140 ... but not always in the right direction. Or even in any direction. I have, though, discovered an infallible method for increasing distance on the short irons. Hit the ball with the leading edge of the club just below the equator of the ball. It goes like a chuffing rocket, then, about 3 feet off the floor and 40 yards further than you normally hit it. Just right to crush someone's hoo-jahs should they get in the way.<BR/><BR/>When that guy did his Sammy Sosa impression, did he also do a couple of little sideways skip steps as he started walking after his ball? That would be cool. Although, even better would be like Ricky Henderson used to do and just toss his bat away at someone as soon as he hit it. But I always loved watching Ken Griffey Jr hit - he is poetry in motion. What? It's not a baseball blog? Oh.<BR/><BR/>5 hours 45 is far too long for a round of golf. I could go round twice in that time, in the right company. In a cart, obviously. My tummy is too big to inflict that upon my tootsies, back to back. Once I go beyond 4 hours (and even that is 30 minutes too long for a round) I lose the will to live and I just want to be out of there and off the course as quickly as possible. Perhaps it might be different if I played Augusta or Pebble Beach, but come on, guys. What are you doing out there? Just 'cos you see the top 10 in the world doing it when Majors are at stake, doesn't mean Joe Q. 14-24 handicapper should do it on a Saturday morning when you're playing for a quid.<BR/><BR/>Who's Martha Stewart? Is she Rod Stewart's mother?<BR/><BR/>I've said enough. Take care, Tom and KYN.<BR/><BR/>DavidAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11606874.post-15179741313462606652007-04-24T18:48:00.000-05:002007-04-24T18:48:00.000-05:00That really means a lot. Thanks so much for leavi...That really means a lot. Thanks so much for leaving the comment, texan. I hope to keep you coming back for more.Tom Collinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11022106971991560269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11606874.post-71297975589511815372007-04-24T16:55:00.000-05:002007-04-24T16:55:00.000-05:00Just wanted to drop a quick comment... been readin...Just wanted to drop a quick comment... been reading this for a while now, and wanted to let you know it is one of the best blogs out there. Great stories, great writing.New Texanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06216050425313923932noreply@blogger.com