An even longer day: my first double

I'll try to be brief. There was a lot that happened today, but let me try to pick out the highlights.
I guess first and foremost, I was curious as to how much I should say on the golf course. For example: in my first round, I caddied for a guy who was obviously coming down too steep and cutting across the ball. The resulting shots were never consistent or pleasant. He kept asking everyone, "What the hell am I doing?" Now I was told during training that the less you say as a caddie (as far as non-tour caddies are concerned), the better your tip. Because statistically, the more you say, the more you can be wrong about. I ended up not saying anything, but I felt bad. I mean, this is the first time the guy played in 6 months, so I think I made the right call. He should just be out there to try to have fun. Plus, I'm an inexperienced caddie. And I'm sure he knew that. I don't know. I think I did the right thing. Although, I suppose that's what defines you as a caddie--if you have the balls to give out advice--otherwise, you'd probably just be considered a bag carrier who does some occasional forecaddying.

Anyway, moving along.

On the 16th these guys (who were extremely cool by the way) actually let us hit a tee shot. They were having a closest-to-the-pin contest and decided to let the caddies in on it. The club I used was a little short, so I faded it off the green. But it didn't matter whether I hit the green or not. It just felt great to swing a club again.

On the 18th my man got a phone call. It wasn't a good call. I could tell before he even hung up. He looked sick. I figured a deal went bad at the office. I was right, but I had underestimated just exactly HOW bad it really was.

"I just lost $500 million."

For a second I almost laughed. It sounded ridiculous, like an Austin Powers joke or something. But no, it was no joke.

"I mean, it's not my money, but I was supposed to get a piece of that."

Wow.

He left a pretty good tip for someone who had just had about the worst business day ever. I shook all their hands and was making my way out to the parking lot when my boss called out, "Hey, you good for another 18?"

Um, yeah. I guess so.

"Good. Meet me out front in about 10."

And so it went. I ended up carrying for a guy with some amazing ability. In fact, the whole foursome wasn't that bad. I would call out a yardage or read a putt, and they would hit it exactly where I told them to. It felt great. Felt like I was actually doing something.

My only problem was with the other two guys I was caddying with. One of them was new and wouldn't stop asking questions. Which I know you have to do that when you're new, but they came all the time, and his compliments to the players were all so incredibly fake. You could tell he just had one of those personalities that THOUGHT he knew how to schmooze, but he really has no idea. And the other kid was really cocky. Some young punk. On the 11th--which is a par-3 over water to a small landing area--he leans over to me and says, "I bet you at least one of them puts it in the water."

I looked up after this comment, and yep, the member heard him. Smooth move you little bastard.

But it happened again.

The second player to hit put it in the water. So he turns to me again, "I bet the next one puts it in the water too."

YOU STUPID LITTLE BITCH. SHUT UP AND STOP KILLING THIS TIP.

I mean, that's what I WANTED to say. But I ended up just staring at him.

But by the end, the tip ended up being satisfactory. But I was convinced it could've been better. I mean, I know I'm not that experienced yet, but those guys were terrible.

Anyway, another day, another dollar. Take it easy ya'll.